Sure, I kick puppies, steal candy from babies, and I occasionally speed. But the one thing I don't do is run red lights; that just seems like a dangerous pastime. So, as you can imagine, I was astonished to receive a "NOTICE OF VIOLATION" from the Arlington, Texas Police Department for running red lights.
As I opened the envelope to reveal the details of my apparent violation, I was adamant that I didn't do it! I don't run red lights!
After some lame DivX issue with the video codex... you know, YouTube can broadcast the stupidest stuff, but this outfit can't figure out a lightweight, cross-platform way (i.e. Flash) to deliver the grainy video of the violations. Perhaps its a conspiracy... if I can't watch the video, and if the video is poor quality, it will be harder for me to fight it.
I was still adamant that I didn't do it. I don't run red lights.
So, after pulling my Windows computer out of the mothballs and installing the DivX codec (seriously) I finally saw the video. Whoops! I guess I did run the red light. Wow. How could that be?
As I watched the cartoon-like sped-up video of me not stopping at the red light and making a right hand turn and admitting that I did it, I started to think why. Turns out there is a Chipotle burrito place just outside of the frame. I guess I was in a hurry to get home and eat it. I was so stoked about my upcoming burrito-fest that I apparently threw caution to the wind and ran the red light.
But wait! Upon closer examination of the video, I noticed something... a green right-turn arrow. Yup. While the lights in the other lanes in my direction were red, the light in my little lane on the right, by the curb, did in fact have a green arrow. It is very hard to see from the video, but it is there. Vindication! I told you, I didn't do it.
So, where is the "please check this again" button? How can I clear my name quickly and easily? Hmm.... what? To fight this, even though the video is clearly in my favor, I must go to court!
So, now the fun begins. What do I have to do? First, I was the driver, but the ride belongs to my Special Lady Friend so technically she got the ticket. Since I like her and want to keep things happy, we decided to have the blame transferred to me. To do this, we have to download the Non-Liability Affidavit PDF from the http://www.violationinfo.com/ website. Then we fill that out, get it notarized and take it in, along with the request for a hearing to the City of Arlington. The city will notarize it for you for $5 but I didn't want to give them any extra money. I decided to go to Hellbent Tattoos, Body Piercing, and Notary instead. Turns out the Notary wasn't there, so I ended up going to a mailbox place. That was a bummer because I wanted to go to the tattoo place to get a document notarized. I've always thought that was the weirdest combination of services. Anyway, it still cost me $5.
So we headed over to the Police Department ready to do battle. Well, not really, we just wanted to setup the court date and then we'd prepare for battle. When we got in, the police officer behind the counter asked what we wanted. We told him we needed to transfer blame and setup a court date. There was a mistake on the video. He asked if we wanted to watch the video so we sat and waited. Not too much later a lady came and got us and took us to a back room. She turned the computer on and opened up the administrative side of the Violation Info site where she had much higher resolution images and video. She pulled up the still pictures first and what do you know; there it was, plain as day, the right turn arrow. She couldn't believe it. Apparently this is rare and the systems actually do function correctly most of the time.
She called someone who had my ticket dismissed. Well, as my Special Lady Friend explained, it was her ticket that was dismissed. They never did the transfer of blame and we wasted $5! In my attempt to keep them from taking more of my money, I ended up wasting some. The lesson here? If the violation you received is clearly wrong, go right down the police station and very nicely ask them to review the video and pictures. They will dismiss it. Only do this if it is really a mistake, otherwise you'll look like an idiot... apparently some people do this.
The coolest part was that the lady who worked with us most likely assumed we were wrong and that I really did run the red light. As you know, our prisons are filled with innocent people, or so they claim. But she never let me know what she really thought. She was nice, smiling, and non-combative. When she saw the mistake, she took care of it and we all laughed. It went off swimmingly. Not at all how I expected this to go and it almost made me trash this post.
I will say this... even though we had a happy ending, the entire process is flawed. Since this was obviously just the officer who reviewed the video missing something, wouldn't it be easier to have a "please review again" button. If I'm wrong, you can add another $20.00 to the fine. If I'm right, you cancel the violation and send me a $5 Starbucks gift card. Okay, fine... you don't have to do the gift card. But if this were a fair process, the ability to push back for a second review would be there. As it stands, they have made it so difficult to fight, that it would be easier to just pay the fine. Ah ha! Of course it is, they give you 12 ways to pay and make that as smooth as cheese. But to fight it, even if I am clearly innocent, that takes time and effort. I won't go down the slippery slope of conspiracy theorists, but this is so obviously just a money grab its not even funny.
At least the lady at the Police Department was nice and I got the ticket dismissed.
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